“Hello. Thank you for calling Macy’s, my name is (insert name here). How can I provide you with excellent customer service today?” Sadly, based on my recent experience at the Streets of Tanasbourne location, quite simply: You can’t.

One of the most frustrating experiences in a persons’ life can be shopping. Whether it is trolling the isles of the local grocery store, pushing an enormous cart at the local Costco or roaming the mall with a thousand tweens wandering aimlessly. Unfortunately, I had to go the the dreaded Mall and I foolishly believed that this particular shopping trip would be a quick in and out job.

The task: Buy a new coffee maker. The destination: Macy’s at the Streets of Tanasbourne in Hillsboro. The time frame: Half an hour. One would think, I know which model I want. I know where I am going. How hard can this be? It turns out; extremely difficult.

The reason why I chose to go to Macy’s was that I was lured in with one of those “HUGE ONE DAY ONLY SALES!” That only happen like every other day, but in this case  they were advertising “Entire stock of coffee maker, 40% off” and truth be told after about six months of making do with my dilapidated coffee maker, I had had enough. One can only procrastinate the inevitable for so long. It was time.

So, I got up early Saturday morning and planned my day, including the shopping trip in question. Macy’s has a tendency to mail out additional savings coupons to card members. I do not have a Macy’s charge account, but my mother in law does and I had noticed the weekend prior that she had a few “additional 20% off coupons”  lying atop her counter. I liked the idea of saving a few extra dollars, which in my case was nearly twenty-five bucks and that made the trip to Macy’s that much more necessary. Upon retrieval, I checked the six or so disclaimers and was excited that it bore no mention of the additional savings not applying to home appliances. Hook, line and sinker.

I drove to the nearest Macy’s, which happened to be about six miles away, and found my coffee maker destiny, waiting for me. It was on sale, just as advertised for about $113. With the extra 20% off it hovered right above $91. Satisfied with my decision, I approached the register to pay for my purchase and presented my coupon. Imagine my surprise when I was told that I was not able to apply to discount. What? Why? I read the back. It made no mention of this. What was going on? Time elapsed: Ten minutes.

“You can’t use the coupon on “special prices.” I inquired as to what, exactly qualified a price as being special. “It says “special” on the tag.” I was told. Huh? Okay. I quickly turned the discount card over and read the disclaimer again. I asked her, politely, to please point out where that statement was indicated. She pointed to an area that said something to that effect. Right above that was also a statement that read that additional discounts would be applied to the already reduced sale price. So, back to the original question: What differentiates a sale price and a special price? Isn’t the sales price a special price? After all, it wasn’t priced 40% off every day. I was thoroughly confused. I have worked retail in the past and thought I spoke fluent retail but this was not making sense and the cashier couldn’t really differentiate between the two either. I was getting nowhere. It was time to ask for a manger to figure this out. Time elapsed: Fifteen minutes.

The cashiers name was Lina. She was quite professional and courteous. She maintained her calm as she made four attempts to summon a manager. After three phone calls to three separate mangers (each one stating that they didn’t have time and to call someone else) a manager agreed to come talk to me. That is, as soon as she completed some task. Finally, I was getting somewhere. Time elapsed: Twenty five minutes.

I waited and watched. Customer after customer, each holding the additional 20% off coupon in hand, inquired about usage and were told “No, the discount didn’t apply to electronics.” Wait a minute, I thought that it was because it was a special price, plus since when had a kitchen appliance mutated into electronics? Whatever the reason was, at least get the reason straight. I watched as three people neglected to purchase their items due to the inability to use their coupon. We are in a recession right? I thought sales were a good thing. Additionally, people are very thoughtful with how they spend their money. Time elapsed: Thirty five minutes.

Where was this manager I had been promised? I asked the cashier and was told that the manager had customers. I thought to myself, “Imagine that! Customers at Macy’s? What a surprise!” Still annoyed, I told her that I understood. I called my appointment that I had made earlier, informed them of my tardiness and gave myself another fifteen minutes. I don’t know why I had imagined that this would take more than that. More customers came and went and I waited. Time elapsed: Forty five minutes.

I grew more and more impatient and asked where the store’s main offices were, maybe I could just talk to the Store Manager. “She doesn’t talk to customers,” I was told. Huh? What kind of retail hell was I stuck in? Annoyed by the response while realizing that I was going to be even later, I knew that I had had enough. I wanted someone to talk to me and now. This was absolutely ridiculous. I honestly could not believe that a customer mattered this little. Lina, the cashier, felt badly and left her post in pursuit of a manager. Time elapsed: Fifty five minutes.

She returned sans manager and told me that the manager that she had spoken with had agreed to let me use the 20% coupon, With the understanding that this was not going to happen again. That was just fine, I just wanted to go. Thank you for the discount and so on, but don’t worry. I will not be purchasing an item of this nature from Macy’s ever again. Time elapsed: One hour? Seriously?

As I left, with my coffee maker in tow, a manager approached. “Of course,” I thought, “Now.” She walked with me as I left and apologized over and over again. Her name was Devin and she was gracious, but honestly, at this point it didn’t matter.

The most frustrating thing about the situation in general was not the coupon. If I had been given a satisfactory response by anyone, including the cashier, I would have complied. I was never given that opportunity and was treated indifferently and was dismissed by four managers. Additionally, I had wasted an hour of my time. Something that nobody has an infinite amount of. As a manager in a customer service based setting, I was appalled that this was how they treated their customers, especially in such a tumultuous economy.

The 6th amendment of the constitution provides us the right to a fair and speedy trial. Too bad there isn’t a provision that provides us the right for fair and speedy service.

This article is part of the PDX Customer Service series from ThePortlander. The column is written by Sabrina, a Portlander with over 15 years of customer service management experience and a business degree from Marylhurst University. She writes frequently about the good, bad and ugly of customer service in Portland.

Related posts:

1. Starbucks Failing At Customer Service
2. Lars Larson Spreading False Information?
3. Shut’em Down U.S Postal Service To Close 5 Oregon Locations